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Friday, October 30, 2015

That Voice in Your Head: Living Powerfully

            You know that voice in your head that talks to you and just won’t shut up. Yeah, that one. The one that is saying, “Oh yeah, I know that voice.” Or maybe you aren’t like that. So, the voice in your head is saying, “What is this guy talking about? I don’t have a voice in my head!” Yeah, that’s the one. Or, maybe it’s saying, “Oh, do I have a voice in my head? I wonder. Well if everyone has one, then I guess I have one.” Yeah that’s the one. And, if you are really truly unique, the voice in your head is saying, “Not me. I don’t have a voice in my head. I’m no ordinary person. I am different.” Yeah, that’s the voice I'm talking about.

            What does that voice tell you? It depends. It depends on what language(s) you speak. Right? Otherwise you wouldn’t understand the voice in your head. (Now that would be confusing. Kinda cool, though.) What that voice tells you also depends on where you were born and live. Makes sense, right? Otherwise, the context would be all confusing and wouldn’t make sense. It depends on your personality. It depends on your relationships. It depends on your parents. It depends on your children. It depends on where you work. It depends on whether the guy behind the counter put whip cream on your latte. It depends.

            That voice is common to the human condition. It is part of being human. It is something that we all share. We all have a voice in our head. Also, that voice speaks from a certain perspective. No matter what it is actually saying, it comes from a common foundation that we all share:

1 – “There is something wrong here, and, that something is me.” What is the voice in your head saying right now? “Oooowww, that’s deep. Such a profound idea.” Or maybe it’s saying, “@#$%! That’s not true. There’s nothing wrong with me.” Or maybe, it’s saying, “Ok, I can see that.”

The voice in our head tells us things. It tries to guide us through life. It directs us on what to believe and who to trust. It tells us what to eat and what to avoid. But, the first thing underlying all of that is this, “There is something wrong here, and that something is me.” So, your voice has told you something like: look prettier, get stronger, be more guarded, be more sensitive, to live in the moment, eat less and exercise more, read more, keep growing, hide, don’t take anything serious, laugh more, play more, numb the pain, or maybe all of the above at one time or the other. The voice in our head has a lot to say. It almost never shuts up.

The voice in our head assumes that we are the something that is wrong and either wants to fix us or tries to avoid facing the fact that something is wrong. Each moment, you and I have to decide whether, on the one hand, to do what the voice is saying or to fight against the voice.

Which one dominates is up to you. Whether you choose to stand and fight or run and hide is up to you. Now that voice in your head is saying, “I’m gonna stand and fight!” or “Fighting, no thanks. I’m gonna run and hide.” Or, maybe that voice in your head is saying, “It is not that simple. There are always other choices that we have. I read in a book once, that…” Or maybe, it’s saying, “I’m gonna fight! That’s the right answer isn’t it? Running and hiding can’t be the right answer. Or is it? Is this a trick question?”

And, that’s the point. We have a voice in our head that is responding every moment to the foundational belief that "there is something wrong here, and that something is me." Regardless of what it is saying, that is where it is coming from. It is looking for the right answer, the best way, to get past this life-altering, foundational belief that something is wrong and by working so hard to get past it, it confirms moment by moment, day after day that:

“There is something wrong here, and that something is me.”

The second belief began a little later in life, but it is just as foundational. It is the second underlying belief behind what the voice in our head tells us.

2 – “I don’t belong.” The voice tells you and me that if we looked a certain way and not another then we would belong. The voice tells us to eat a certain way and not another. The voice tells us to change ourselves, educate ourselves, grow, become, transform, metamorphosize into something that fits, something that belongs.

You have been responding to that foundational belief ever since. Your actions in life, the career you have, the spouse you chose, the place you live, the friends you have, the makeup you wear is all in response to that underlying premise, “I don’t belong.”

The voice in your head is again telling you, “Yes that’s true!” Or, “No, that’s crap!” Others of you, the voice, is saying, “Where is this all going? What’s the point already!?”

Fair enough. That’s not the real point that I am learning and trying to share with you. It just is. It is what it is. We have a voice in our heads. And, that voice, regardless of what it says, is coming from this place: “There is something wrong here, and that something is me,” and “I don’t belong.”

Sometimes we do what that voice tells us and sometimes we don’t. No, that’s not the point either. It just is.

So, wait for the voice. Listen for it. Hear it. Then, choose whether to do what the voice says or not. Then, recognize that you made the choice. You decided whether or not to listen. You chose whether to eat that piece of cake or not, whether to get out of bed or not. You chose.

You are not the voice in your head. That voice is not you.

Here’s the point: You have power over the voice in your head unless you give that voice power over you. Either way it’s your choice, your power.

You are powerful. You are great. But, you and I can choose to live powerless and small.

I don’t want to. I like living powerfully. It is fun and allows me to make the kind of impact that I want to make. So, I am going to choose to live powerfully and BIG. Do you want to know why? Because I choose to. I choose to because I choose to. I am powerful and have a choice, and I choose to live BIG.

You are powerful. You are great.You are not the voice in your head. You have power over it. So exercise ... or don't. Just don't believe the lie that you didn't have a choice. You are powerful. You can choose to obey the voice in your head or choose to ignore it. You are great. Be great.

Any questions or want to know more, leave a comment below or contact me directly. This has been a life-changing reality for me. I trust it can be for you. Your choice!