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Showing posts with label wait. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wait. Show all posts

Friday, March 15, 2013

Once Upon a Time: A Beautiful Maiden, Buddy and Me


Once upon a time, there was a beautiful maiden. She was married to a handsome and kind man. Her father-in-law died and so her mother-in-law came to live with them. To everyone’s amazement they all got along and would have lived happily ever after except then the story would be too short.

So, her husband died. The beautiful maiden knew not what to do. She loved her mother-in-law, but the custom of her husband’s family was that she should marry her dead husband’s brother and have children with him to carry on her dead husband’s lineage. 

But, her mother-in-law was old and kind of wrinkly, and her prospects of her mother-in-law finding a new husband and having a son with him were slim. And, even if she did, the maiden would have to wait until he was of age and then she’d have to marry a kid she helped to raise and it would just be really awkward.

But alas, she couldn’t leave her mother-in-law’s side. When her mother-in-law decided to return to her homeland in order to find help from her family, she told the maiden to go back to her father’s house where she could find a new husband and forget their crazy custom.

She looked her mother-in-law square in the eye and said, “Don't force me to leave you. Don't make me turn back from following you. Wherever you go, I will go, and wherever you stay, I will stay. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God.” And, that settled that.

When they arrived in the old country, the mother-in-law told her of another way, even weirder than the first. It was a long shot, but just maybe. The maiden learned that the wealthy man who’s grain she had been picking was a distant cousin of her husband and a close enough relative to fulfill the responsibility of the custom. If she could marry him and bear his children, she could preserve the line of her dead husband.

He was giving her attention and treated her better than he treated his own servant girls!

So, she took a big risk. She slipped into the barn and lay down by his feet while he was sleeping. Then, she pulled the blanket off his feet so they would get cold and eventually he woke up.

When he did, he found her and knew what she wanted. He told her to go back to sleep and he would take care of everything. They went back to sleep and in the morning she slipped out of the barn before anyone else got up so that no nasty rumors got started.

After a little finagling, they got married and lived happily ever after.

The End.

Buddy, our dog, is a lot like the maiden from this story. He sometimes wants my attention. So, he leans. He covers. He presses in. He will walk right up next to me, not even looking at me. He will get as close as possible to my legs and then lean against me. Not demanding anything from me. He wants me to know that he is there. He wants me to feel that he is there. Sometimes, he’ll lay down right there on my feet. He is being a constant and faithful presence, waiting for me. And, he can be very patient. He will wait for my touch, my stroke, my “Good dog.” (Unless he hears a car door or someone walking up the steps, of course. Then he is off, springing to action.)

We need to be like the maiden and like Buddy. We need to lay at God’s feet and just be there, patiently, lovingly, faithfully waiting for Him to acknowledge us. We need to be persistent, regardless of the circumstances of our lives and, wait for him to speak, to encourage, to lead, to guide, to simply say, “You are good.” Yeah, the car door slamming, the phone ringing, the schedule bustling may distract us, but we need to get to resting at his feet more and more.

With our patience and faithfulness we say to God, “Wherever you go, I will go, and wherever you stay, I will stay.”

He will speak. He promises to. We just need to wait and listen.

"The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep respond to his voice. He calls his sheep by name and leads them out of the pen. After he has brought out all his sheep, he walks ahead of them. The sheep follow him because they recognize his voice."- John 10:3-4

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Part 4: How Long Would You Wait?


"How long do I wait?" That's what I kept thinking.  My son had gone into the Laser Tag arena for the first time. And, when everyone else returned, he was nowhere to be seen. I was beginning to worry. Not that he was kidnapped or hurt, but that he is in there freaking out or crying because he is lost or afraid. "Where is he?" I thought, still not ready to give words to my fear. How long do I wait until I say something or do something?

Here's the back story:

My son went to a classmate's birthday party this past weekend. He is in a new school, so he was a little nervous and was experiencing some new things with some new people, so he asked me to stay with him. I was glad to, and I made a deal with him. "You do your best to try as many new things as you can. Try really hard to be independent, and I will try really hard to be right there when you need me." It was a great party. Ryan got to drive a Go Kart, go rollerblading, and play Laser Tag all for the first time in his young life.


Each of the kids and the birthday boy's father all went into the Laser Tag arena...in the dark with strangely glowing lights and loud music. Not Ryan's comfort zone by any means. I wondered how he would do, but he went in and tried his best. I was so proud that he was willing to go in there without me.


Then, they all came out, the dad first, then a boy and a couple more. About 5 minutes later everyone was there ... except Ryan. OK, did he slip by unnoticed? Did he head over to the arcade? No. OK, what now?  But, I know in my mind it's not a big deal. But, I have to say something ... or should I just wait.

I finally tell the teen who has been assigned to our group. "One's still missing. My son is still in there." She counted up our group, looked around for him and then went back in to find him. A couple of minutes later, she came out with Ryan, a little shaken but no worse for the wear. I was happy that he had tried something new, and I was happy that I could be there when he needed me. I think he was glad too.

The question that I had to answer is the same one we all face when trying to resolve conflict. How long should we wait? How long until we give up hoping that the other person will respond with love and grace?

The process of Remembering looks something like this: Repent, Rethink, Redo, Remain, Respond, and Restart. Today is about remaining.



Remain:

Remain steadfast. Remain prayerful. Remain hopeful. Remain in Christ. In other words, wait. Continue to do your part, continue to repent, continue to rethink and make plans. But, wait. Trust God to do His part and pray for your child to do their part. They will need your prayers and your patience. Generally speaking, the longer there has been a rift, the longer they will need to heal and to trust you.

Isaiah 26:3 – Those of steadfast mind you keep in peace—in peace because they trust in you. (NRSV)

So, maybe you are wondering, "How long should I wait for my child to respond to me with love and grace? How long is too long? When should I give up and just walk away?"

The question that never occurred to me standing outside that Laser Tag arena is, "How long until I give up trying to find Ryan?" My favorite show is on in an hour, I don't want to miss it. My wife is making Chicken Cordon Bleu tonight, I guess I look for Ryan again tomorrow. My feet are hurting from walking around that roller rink so many times. Ryan is old enough to know better, he should be able to find his way back. That's absurd!

I wouldn't give up. That was never in question.

Just like you would never stop loving your child. Don't let yourself ask, "How much more of this can I take? How much more before I totally give up? How much longer until I lose all hope of having a relationship with my child?"

Those questions may be natural to have when you have tried so hard and feel like there is just no response at all from your child. But don;t dwell on those thoughts. Those questions have no place in our hearts as parents.

We have to commit to never give up.

Remain steadfast
for as long as it takes.
Never give up.
Keep hoping.
Cling to God for strength until that day comes.

If you need prayer for strength today, to keep hoping, please comment here, email or Facebook message me. I will be glad to pray for you or with you.