When Jesus Isn't Enough

Is Jesus enough?

If you were to sit in a church on a Sunday morning, thinking about Scripture, singing praise songs like All in All, Knowing You and Indescribable, you might know what the “right answer” is.

"Of Course Jesus is enough. What more could we need or want? With Jesus, all things are possible. Apart from him we can do nothing."

Is Jesus enough? "Yes."

Well, that would be an awfully short blog post, and because I have been wrestling with that question for days this week, I think there might be some more to say on the subject.

I know that he is enough. I have taught others that Jesus is enough. And, I believe that Jesus is enough. But this week, I didn’t feel like Jesus was enough. In fact, I could have easily named a few things that I longed for that at the time seemed more pressing than Jesus.

Nothing earth shattering happened this week. What happened to me this week was all quite normal, but I questioned one of the central tenets of my faith. Is Jesus really enough?

I was tired, but that is often true because I am out of shape. I felt guilty and un-everything good: unworthy, unlovable, unproductive, unloving. I was lonely and felt isolated from the ones I love. I started to wallow in all of these emotions while I was reading and praying and preparing for this week's sermon which started out being about fasting.

It was still about fasting, but the focus became quite clear. Is Jesus enough?

Do you know what I needed, (or maybe "wanted" is a better word for it)? I wanted someone to put their arm around me, rub my back and ask me what was wrong. I wanted someone to listen to me sort through my thoughts and tell me it was going to be OK. I wanted a physical person to sit with me and maybe read the Bible to me or give me some godly advice. I wanted a friend.

And this was a week that I had some good habits.  I took my own advice and spent the first 5 minutes out of bed on my knees in prayer each morning this week, and I read Scripture this week, and I listened to some songs of praise, and I took a walk yesterday to think and clear my head. But, in all of that, I still didn’t feel like Jesus was enough. I still wanted a person, a friend.

My feelings are not really what this post is about though. I have spent maybe too long talking about them. I wanted to talk about them though so that you could relate to what I am saying, so we could get past the easy answer of, “Yes, of course Jesus is enough.”

In theory, Christians all know, “Yes, Jesus is enough.” But, in practice, we all feel at times that, “No, Jesus is not enough.”

That is why when we are faced with a choice between sinning and choosing righteousness, we choose sin way too often. That is why when we are faced with challenging or sometimes tragic circumstances, we ask why and doubt God’s love or wisdom or compassion. That is why when we are faced with a difficult choice, we worry and fear that we might make the wrong choice and will then be headed in the wrong direction.

These are three times when we are faced with the question, “Is Jesus enough?” and often come to the conclusion that he very certainly is not. Sin, Circumstances and Choices:

When we sin, we proclaim that Jesus is not enough.

1.      With pride, Jesus gaining glory is not enough, we want some of that glory for ourselves.

2.      With lust, Jesus’ provision for us is not enough, we want something more for ourselves.

3.      With worry, Jesus’ Lordship is not enough, we want a better god, one that does what we want.

When we sin, it shows us our true belief. We answer the question, “Is Jesus enough?” with a resounding, “No. No, he is not enough. I need more.”

Circumstances in life might pull us to believe that Jesus is not enough:

When your child is in the hospital and you’re afraid.

When you’re hoping immigration will allow you to remain in the country.

When you are wondering if you are going to lose your job.

When your health problems are beyond the understanding of the doctors.

When you don’t know if you will have enough money to pay the rent.

OR, when you are feeling lonely and isolated and in need of a friend.

The circumstances are as varied as our lives, but the question is the same, “Is Jesus enough?” And, quite often, we answer, “No. No Jesus is not enough. I need one more thing. I need this circumstance to work out the way I want it to. Just one more thing, then Jesus will be enough.”

Choices:

Sometimes when we have a difficult or important choice ahead of us, we have that same question. We know that whatever we choose will redirect the course of our lives.

What college to go to or what career to pursue.

Who to marry or not marry.

Should I adopt or foster or not?

Do I move to this city or that?

Do we or don’t we? The choices could be much smaller than these of course, but the fear is the same, whatever choice I make, when I arrive on the other side of this, “Will Jesus be enough?” If I go the way I want and hopefully the way He wants me to, will Jesus be there with me and assuming He will, “Will Jesus be enough?” It’s so hard to know from this side of the choice. It sometimes feels like this choice is life or death. If I choose correctly, Jesus will be enough, but if I don’t, I’m really afraid that I will be miserable. I will have lost my chance.

Which brings us FINALLY to fasting and Scripture:

Matt 6:16-18

¹⁶ “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. ¹⁷ But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, ¹⁸ so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

He will Reward you. This reward seems to be heavenly. It seems to be talking about something that we receive in the Kingdom of God. But, as we see throughout this Sermon on the Mount (Matthew chapters 5-7), the question the Sermon on the Mount is answering is how does the Kingdom of God look here on earth and how do those who are in the Kingdom of God act toward their neighbors.

So, though the reward is heavenly, it has earthly consequences. It effects us today. What we do in secret (like fasting), affects us and those around us in public.

A couple of chapters later in Matthew, Jesus is asked a question about fasting:

Matt 9:14-15

¹⁴ Then John’s disciples came and asked him, “How is it that we and the Pharisees fast often, but your disciples do not fast?”
¹⁵ Jesus answered, “How can the guests of the bridegroom mourn while he is with them? The time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; then they will fast.

Fasting is described as an act of mourning when we have been separated from Christ.

This seems to be the key to fasting. When we are more keenly aware of our separation from Christ than we are aware of his presence and closeness to us, fasting can help us to reorient ourselves to Christ. He was with us, but now he is not. Fasting reminds us not to fear, because he will be with us again.

Fasting helps us in regards to the three things I brought up earlier: Sin, Circumstances and Choices. In regards to sin, it reminds us that our sinful desires and choices never deliver what they promise. They don’t bring us the peace and joy and love that we long for. In regards to circumstances, fasting reminds us not to worry and fear, but to trust and cling to Christ, that regardless of the outcome of the circumstances, our only peace and joy and love comes through Christ. In regards to choices that we have to make, fasting reminds us that Christ is guiding us even now, but even if we make the "wrong" choice, Christ will be with us on the other side of the choice. And, if Christ is with us, then we can answer the question, “Is Jesus Enough?” with a resounding, “Yes.”

One of the most important verses in my life is a quote of Jesus that Paul writes down in his letter to the Corinthians. This is Paul quoting something that Christ said to him:

2 Corinthians 12:⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

(But, Paul didn't show up in the Scriptures until after Christ was crucified. He never met Christ! And, everyone knows that Paul never met Christ, so he isn't trying to trick anyone. But, Paul did meet Christ spiritually speaking. And, Christ spoke to Paul, and Paul felt confident enough in his ability to know what Christ was saying to him, to quote him.

We, too, can "hear" from Christ. We can have the confidence that he is speaking to us and guiding us and encouraging us. For more on prayer and listening to God read this post.)

God's grace is sufficient for us. Christ is sufficient for us. He is enough.

But, sometimes it takes more than reading a blog post to believe that. Fasting may be God's way of answering the question, "Is Jesus enough?"

Choosing to fast is choosing to act in Faith. Even if sin or circumstances or a looming choice has us disoriented and wondering if Jesus is enough, we can choose to take the first step in faith. We may take this first step of fasting by faith with the prayer, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" like the father who wanted Jesus to help his son (Mark 9:24).

Fasting is choosing for a relatively short amount of time (1 day to 40 days, usually) to go without something that you might otherwise be tempted to think that you "Need!" It can be food all together, a type of food or drink. It can be an activity that you perform daily. It can be a type of entertainment or media.

For example, drinking coffee is often something people say they can't live without. Well, that happens to be a lie. And, fasting coffee for a week or month could help you move closer to Christ.

Others may check Facebook multiple times throughout the day and their actual dependence upon Christ might be more evident if they fasted from Facebook.

Maybe it's your cell phone, lunches, all food (check with your doctor to see if this is safe for you), reading certain types of books or magazines. Whatever it might be that fasting from it, might encourage you in your walk with Christ, and might remind you that Jesus is enough.

Fasting is an act of Faith and an act of Hope.

I am preventing myself from having this food or drink or media, in faith, though my faith is weak, I trust that God will somehow use this to strengthen my faith. It is also a hopeful action. Our Hope is in Christ that he will meet me here in this act. That this action will have eternal impact in my life and through me to impact this world. “Thy Kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven.” 

I need to Fast.

The Necessity of Fear: How to Fear Productively

I have a friend who is afraid of crowds. So, he tries to avoid them. I am afraid of heights, so I limit my time on our roof. My son may still be afraid of the dark, so he avoids it by using a light.

The Face of Fear - Blurry Fear

That is not what we mean when we say, "Fear God." But, in reality, many people hear that. They fear God by avoiding him.

Some try to avoid him by not going to church. Many try to avoid him by not thinking about Him. Often, people even avoid thinking about other things that remind them of God.

The list of avoided topics varies, but how about these for starters:

Death
Meaning of life
Our true self
Sin
Guilt
Shame
Pain

"I just don't want to think about it."
"I don't want to talk about it."

We avoid them and in turn avoid God because we are afraid of God, afraid of the unknown.

God's desire is to be known. He has revealed Himself through creation and nature. He has revealed Himself to individuals throughout history. He has revealed Himself through the Bible. He has revealed Himself through Jesus Christ. He continues to reveal Himself through his church (when we let Him by being obedient).

He is hard to avoid. Whether we go to the top of a mountain or the bottom of the ocean, there He is. Whether we go where it is pitch dark or find some uncharted island, there He is.

And, we are told to fear this unavoidable God.

What Does it Mean to Fear God?

I heard this explained over breakfast this morning, in a way that made sense.

If we reject God entirely, God promises to reject us. So this should cause fear, but by trying to avoid thinking about God, we tend to not feel that fear until we are face to face with God Himself after death.

If we accept God, God loves and accepts us. So, what is left for us to fear?

His discipline.
His correction.
His regaining of our focus and attention.
His pruning.
His training.

God loves us. He promises not to leave us to die apart from His love and grace. When we get stuck in habitual sin, it is like a fish who has jumped out of the water and is lying on the shore of the ocean unable to breathe. Struggling to survive. He will not leave us there. He promises to rescue us from ourselves, from sin and from death.

He picks us up and throws us back into the ocean of his grace.

Many times it hurts. Our sin can cause irreparable damage to our relationships, to our view of God or of ourselves. If God exposes our sin, it can cause further damage.

Is it because he wants to hurt us?
No.
It is because He is always loving.
The most loving thing He can do in that instance is to rescue us from our sin. If that hurts, then the pain is worth it for the freedom that comes as a result.

Fear God because he has the love to want to rescue us, the power to rescue us, and will rescue us. His discipline and correction will come in order to save us from being separated from his love and grace. Nothing can separate us from His love and grace. Separation is not an option.

Sometimes it comes in the form of physical death. We are eternally freed from our addictions and sin.

Sometimes it comes in the form of physical sickness, disease or injury. Sometimes it comes in the form of broken relationships. Sometimes it comes in the collapse of systems, governments and nations.

He will do whatever it takes to rescue us from sin and death.

Whatever it takes.
Whatever it takes.

Fear God. He loves you enough to do whatever it takes. Fear God and do what He says, obey Him. Avoid sin. Don't avoid God.

"Here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind." - Solomon in the book of Ecclesiastes

Why Christians Must Fear God in Order to Truly Live

I have a friend who is afraid of crowds. So, he tries to avoid them. I am afraid of heights, so I limit my time on our roof. My son may still be afraid of the dark, so he avoids it by using a light.

That is not what we mean when we say, "Fear God." But, in reality, many people hear that. They fear God by avoiding him.

Some try to avoid him by not going to church. Many try to avoid him by not thinking about Him. Often, people even avoid thinking about other things that remind them of God.

The list of avoided topics varies, but how about these for starters:

Death
Meaning of life
Our true self
Sin
Guilt
Shame
Pain

"I just don't want to think about it."
"I don't want to talk about it."

We avoid them and in turn avoid God because we are afraid of God, afraid of the unknown.

God's desire is to be known. He has revealed Himself through creation and nature. He has revealed Himself to individuals throughout history. He has revealed Himself through the Bible. He has revealed Himself through Jesus Christ. He continues to reveal Himself through his church (when we let Him by being obedient).

He is hard to avoid. Whether we go to the top of a mountain or the bottom of the ocean, there He is. Whether we go where it is pitch dark or find some uncharted island, there He is.

And, we are told to fear this unavoidable God.

What Does it Mean to Fear God?

I heard this explained over breakfast this morning, in a way that made sense.

If we reject God entirely, God promises to reject us. So this should cause fear, but by trying to avoid thinking about God, we tend to not feel that fear until we are face to face with God Himself after death.

If we accept God, God loves and accepts us. So, what is left for us to fear?

His discipline.
His correction.
His regaining of our focus and attention.
His pruning.
His training.

God loves us. He promises not to leave us to die apart from His love and grace. When we get stuck in habitual sin, it is like a fish who has jumped out of the water and is lying on the shore of the ocean unable to breathe. Struggling to survive. He will not leave us there. He promises to rescue us from ourselves, from sin and from death.

He picks us up and throws us back into the ocean of his grace.

Many times it hurts. Our sin can cause irreparable damage to our relationships, to our view of God or of ourselves. If God exposes our sin, it can cause further damage.

Is it because he wants to hurt us?
No.
It is because He is always loving.
The most loving thing He can do in that instance is to rescue us from our sin. If that hurts, then the pain is worth it for the freedom that comes as a result.

Fear God because he has the love to want to rescue us, the power to rescue us, and will rescue us. His discipline and correction will come in order to save us from being separated from his love and grace. Nothing can separate us from His love and grace. Separation is not an option.

Sometimes it comes in the form of physical death. We are eternally freed from our addictions and sin.

Sometimes it comes in the form of physical sickness, disease or injury. Sometimes it comes in the form of broken relationships. Sometimes it comes in the collapse of systems, governments and nations.

He will do whatever it takes to rescue us from sin and death.

Whatever it takes.
Whatever it takes.

Fear God. He loves you enough to do whatever it takes. Fear God and do what He says, obey Him. Avoid sin. Don't avoid God.

"Here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind." - Solomon in the book of Ecclesiastes

4 Times When We are Most Likely to Lose Our Cool and What to Do About It

When was the last time you got angry?

For me, it was last week.

I got home from an allergist appointment. They poked me ten times with different sticks (that was fun), and I sat there not itching as I watched the bubble on my skin grow. If you've had one of these tests, you know what I mean.

For 30 minutes, I tried to distract myself from thinking about itching, but every time I looked down at my arm, these bubbles are growing bigger and bigger. And, all I want to do is scratch, just a little bit. Just once or twice and I'd feel better. Then, finally, I made it.

I left the allergist and came home. I beat the boys home by a few minutes and then we were all together for the rest of the night.

No games. No practices. No meetings.

Right after dinner, about 6, I got this crazy headache. I don't usually get them like that, but I felt this pressure pounding on the back of my eyes.

Ethan left the dinner table and was complaining about having to finish his homework.

"Ethan, you have to bring your plate to the sink before you leave the table. You know that."

"But, I have to do my homework." He was not happy.

"Plate first, then your homework. NOW!"

I had been doing well about controlling my temper and hadn't raised my voice like this in weeks, so I got his attention, but he was visibly upset.

He brought the plate to the sink where I was loading the dishwasher, my head still pounding.

"You have to scrape it off first." I held out the plate to him. I could feel the anger rising in me. My heartbeat rising, my eyes pounding.

"I have to do my homework!" He went to his backpack, got out his homework and proceeded to walk right past the outstretched plate.

He was not going to ignore me, disrespect me. I wanted to get those dishes done, go sit down, and close my eyes. The Advil I took didn't touch the pain. Ahhh! I couldn't think straight.

I grabbed him by the back of his sweatshirt, and shoved the plate at him.

"Scrape it off now! Then do your homework."

"OKAY! Jeez!" He did it and I went back to the sink feeling like a complete idiot. All this work on controlling my anger, being patient, talking and not yelling, I thought I might be wasting my time. I will always struggle with anger. Who am I kidding?

My analysis was still clouded by my guilt and shame and the adrenaline still rushing through my body. As I look back now, I can see things more clearly. Maybe you picked up on some of the clues too.

First, I had used up a lot of my self-control at the allergist. It took so much out of me to just sit there and not itch. Self control is like a muscle and when we use it up, it is all used up.

After exerting self control in one area, we can't put ourselves in another situation where we will need a lot of self control and expect to behave well. I should have known.

Second, I was in pain. When we are in pain, physical or emotional, we enter into somewhat of a survival mode. We are more likely to jump straight to "fight or flight" mode without much provocation.

Third, I was working hard to finish a task so that I could go and hopefully get some relief from the pain. I felt an urgency that didn't really exist. I could have simply told Rachel, my wife, about my pain and left the dishes. Ethan was the barrier, I thought. He was frustrating me, blocking me from reaching my goal. Frustration can easily lead to anger and in this case, it led to anger very quickly.

Fourth, I was thinking and trying to analyze the situation in my head. I was talking to myself, defending myself and blaming Ethan. I reasoned that I was the one working hard on the dishes, and he was the one complaining about his homework and having to bring his dish to the sink. I was right, and he was wrong. I was good, and he was bad. I had to act! I chose to act based on adrenaline fueled incomplete thinking.

Fifth, I acted, and immediately felt guilt and shame. I knew that I was right! But, it didn't matter. I felt horrible. I was wrong.

In the course of a couple of minutes, I went from feeling pain, to feeling frustration, to feeling anger, to feeling justified, to feeling shame.

4 Times When We are Most Likely to Lose Our Cool and What to Do About It

What we do when we feel Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired (HALT) can make or break our day.

It can determine whether we feel good about ourselves or feel guilt and shame.

If we behave badly in these circumstances, we can either choose to blame others and further isolate ourselves or looking in the mirror, we can blame ourselves and begin to lose love and respect for ourselves.

When that happens we can do all kinds of self-destructive things. You know which are tempting for you. But, instead of trying to deal with the symptoms, we need to face the disease.

What do we do when we feel hungry, angry, lonely and tired?

The Path

Ask for Help. Ask God for help and then ask people for help. If you believe that God wants you to change, then ask for His help, pray that His will is done in your life. He always answers that prayer. Then it is just up to us to listen and obey.

God will often use people to help us. I asked Rachel for help. Rachel has been a patient, gracious support throughout our life together. I also found a counselor who believed in me, listened to me, and counseled me with wisdom and grace. I have had a number of accountability partners that God used at different times to help me face different sins, to overcome challenges in life and ministry and to encourage me toward some specific goals. God has used each person in different ways to help me move forward. The key in all of these relationships is grace.

Know Yourself. Know your weakness. Pretending to be strong doesn't help any more than pretending to be weak does. Accept your weakness. When are you most likely to feel Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired? Don't be afraid to say, "I can't do that." This was incredibly hard for me to admit in the past. If I can physically stand, than I can do what you are asking me to do. It was hard for me to admit that I was too weak to do something if the weakness was emotional or spiritual. Face it. Admit it to yourself and then...

Set Helpful Boundaries. Know yourself and set up boundaries that will help you live from strength to strength. Good boundaries are crucial to a healthy life. Knowing my weaknesses allows me to know what boundaries I need. For me, there is no need to lock up the wine cellar when I am around, but you might want to hide the remote! I can't stand the taste of alcohol, but I could waste hours watching TV without caring what I was watching.

Here are some boundaries that I set up in my life, that have helped me at different times:
 - Make time to be with my wife, every day to catch up and make sure we are on the same page, every week to face any issues that have arisen or might be coming soon, every month to make sure we are on track with our goals for the year and for life, and every year to do an inventory of our marriage, our family, and ministry together.
- When I am angry, I give myself a time out.
- When I feel lonely, I run to my wife not away from her.
- I take time to understand how I feel, not just what I think.
- Go to bed by 10 or 10:30, so that I can wake up before the kids and have some time to pray and read and listen to God. I need to get back to this one!
- Use an accountability program that sends every website I view to my wife or some other accountability partner. I use Covenant Eyes, (which is also a great tool for parents to talk about and use with their children).
- Limit the number of nights I spend away from home.
- Cook, eat and clean up after meals together as a family as much as possible.
- Vacation together as a family and as a couple.
[I discuss this more personally in Confessions of a Pastor, Part 2.]
 
Solve the Real Problem.

Hungry? Eat something. When you realize that you are hungry and that that hunger is causing you to act in unhealthy ways, eat something. Choose something healthy, but eat something.

Angry? Deal with the underlying cause. [Here's a link to my blog about what usually leads to our Anger, so we can get to the source of it.]

Lonely? Phone a friend. Spend time with a safe person who consistently extends grace to you. If you feel like you have no one, go to God. First let him be your friend, then let him speak to you about being a good friend to others, and then ask him to point you in a direction for making friends.

Tired? Go to sleep. We have had productivity engrained in us since we were kids. The early bird gets the worm, and all that. Work hard, play hard. YOLO. Just Do It. It is never ending. We will never accomplish all that we want to do if we don't get rest. God wants us to work hard and to enjoy life, but he also knew that we need a Sabbath day of rest. Good night!